If you haven’t been to Kress, the new too-cool-for-you restaurant/club/lounge in Hollywood, you’re missing spectacular views, five stories of pan-Asian California art deco redness, aggressive security, and mediocre DJs. But this Sunday you’ll have a chance to check out one of America’s oddest living creations: the living body of Michael Jackson. Returning from his Middle East hideaway, MJ has supposedly invited all of his siblings and a cast of celebrity characters (who exactly, we’re not sure) to ring in his 50th. What makes this item even more ridiculous is that the promoter who put on Sunday nights downstairs at Kress are leaking this story about the night’s special rooftop party, ostensibly to add some caché to their club’s already solidified reputation. In case there’s any doubt, this is another LA club where you will see someone from The Hills, get verbally bitch-slapped by a hostess, and forget about in twelve months when it sits empty and suddenly uncool.
So in case you’re looking to be rejected at a club door this weekend, and you happen to be in LA, come to Kress, where you might catch a glimpse of one of the 20th Century’s greatest music icons, and you’ll definitely not be let in.